Review of The Artist

Review of The Artist

Before video killed the radio star and digital killed the video store, audio killed the silent film biz. Also, if you pass gas in a silent movie theater, it resonates a lot louder. I’m just sayin.

I tried to watch all the Best Picture nominees before the Oscars and failed. Of the six I saw, I was not impressed. For months, I could not talk Jenn into going to see The Artist with me. She claims it’s because she’s pregnant and silent movies make her nauseous. But it’s really because she’s pretentious and addicted to color. Also, I don’t imagine she wanted to have to worry about farting uncontrollably for the reasons I already talked about. So I went by myself to see the valedictorian of summer school, so to speak, as the six nominees I saw previously had a subpar bug average of 4.9 (out of 10). That number was up to 5.6 by the time I left the theater.

This movie was friggin adorable. It jumped out of the gate with pizzazz, both captivating the audience with humor and setting the groundwork for the characters. Including the dog, who would be the real hero of the film. Rarely do I ever root for a happy ending outside of Vegas, and I very much was. And they knew just how to pull it off without being campy. It deserved all 5 Oscars it won and probably one for cinematography, though I understand the Academy’s need to stroke Scorsese’s ego with some second-level throwaway awards.

There aren’t a lot of fresh ideas nowadays. After Memento came out with the whole backwards thing, I thought we were done. The well was dry; the last unused idea had been uncovered and used up. But shooting a silent black and white movie about a character trying to transition through a silent movie business where talkies were taking over was so damn – dare I say – unspeakably clever. Well, this particular application of it was. I only wish I had any friends who would appreciate it. 10 bugs (out of 10)

(Ed note: The movie could earn additional bugs after a period of one year has passed, joining the ranks of Frequency, Big Fish, Memento, Sixth Sense and Back to the Future)

Used or Mused?

Used or Mused?

My Web Design teacher is also the chief webmaster (or something) of the new interface (or something) for Project MUSE. What is it? It’s a way to look up books and articles online. But only on the Johns Hopkins database. So it’s like looking up all species of animals by going to an aquarium. Except, for internet research.

So my teacher has decided to take our class and make us unwilling participants in have us be a part of a study on the usability of Project MUSE. Kinda like how I had my Sports Officiating class come to my apartment and hook up my illegally acquired DVR. There’s definitely some topic-specific learning going on, and possible more than in my example – though I mostly recorded Around the Horn and PTI. It’s actually more like how I would practice my stand up material on my IDIS class. What were they gonna do? Leave? So yes, I feel a little used. But not so much that I don’t like it.

I drove to campus on Tuesday after having completed the “usability assignment” and there was a gentleman on the curb near the parking garage with a bright yellow shirt on that simply read “MUSE” on it. He was waving at traffic. I had no idea Project MUSE was this huge. Suddenly I felt a part of something much bigger. Then I found out there’s a guy named Muse running for city council. That makes more sense.

Why am I writing about Project MUSE? Because one of the lovely ladies behind the project who majored in librarian studies and gave up way too early on my Dewey Decimal trivia question said that every time someone writes on the internet about Project MUSE, she gets pinged. That term is apparently not a euphemism for anything sexual or sport-related like I had originally thought. So I am testing out the reach of the internet to find out if my puny little blog is going to ping the nice librarian lady. (It really does sound dirty, doesn’t it?) Anyway, here you are, Tosheena. If you get this and that means that my blog is one of the top million websites in the country or whatever, I’d be delighted to hear about it. You can ping me at dustinrecsports@gmail.com. If not, at least remember Isaac Asimov.

Double Feature Duel: The Final Four

Double Feature Duel:
The Final Four

Yes! Finally! We (I and whoever the hell else I forced to read this) made it through this Godforsaken tournament. Well, almost. The field has been whittled down to the Final Four. Three 10+ bug movies and a “Who did you sleep with to get here” 7-bugger from the DC Quadrant. And then after this, I can go back to updating my website with news about my pregnant wife, storytelling hijinks and bad sports metaphors.

But first, a few observances about the DC Quadrant:

7-bug Finalist: There were some higher-rated movies in this thing. At least 4 of them at an 8.5 or above. But they all found themselves duking it out on the bottom half of the bracket. Monster (9) squeaked out one over Crazy, Stupid, Love. (8.5) to barely get beaten by Sherlock Holmes 2 (9), who eventually lost to Midnight in Paris (8.5). By the time they were done beating on each other, they must have been too tired to compete with Super 8 (7).

Oscar Nominees: This is the time of the year I typically look to watch the Oscar Best Picture nominees. I saw three of them before the tournament was over, and though one of them made it to the finals of the DC Quadrant (Midnight in Paris), the other two were embarrassingly horrible (Tree of Life and Hugo). This does not bode well for the rest of the field.

Biggest Upset Ever: A 0-bug movie beat a 5-bug movie. That’s ridiculous. A lot of the points were given to Tree of Life just by default, but if I was Limitless, I may adjust my game plan for the next tournament.

And that’s it for now. Stay tuned for the Final Four and the conclusion of the biggest waste of my time in the last 9 months (purely a coincidence).

Double Feature Duel: Super 8 vs. Midnight in Paris

Double Feature Duel:
Super 8 vs. Midnight in Paris 

A movie by the creators of Lost against a guy who married a chick 35 years younger than him for thelast spot in the Final Four. I’m not sure who I’m rooting for.

Title: Super 8 once again for alluding to a time period while cleverly foreshadowing at least two scenes in this movie. All in 6 characters. (Point, Super 1-0)

Funnier: Midnight in Paris certainly has its funny moments, but I’ll go with the dialogue the kids have with each other over the more difficult-to-interpret Woody Allen-isms. (Point, Super 2-0)

Better Turn: The more I think about it, the more ridiculous that train scene was. But it was still just as awesome. (Point, Super 3-0)

Better Ending: By default and by design. (Point, Midnight 3-1)

Better Message: I really like that Midnight in Paris actually had a message, let alone a good one. One of Woody’s deathbed confessions of sorts. (Point, Midnight 3-2)

Better Acting: Sorry, Owen. I will pick Elle Fanning over you every time. Even in The Nines, when she doesn’t talk. (Point, Super 4-2)

More Creative: I like that we’re never really sure if Owen Wilson is dreaming all this or if it’s really happening. (Point, Midnight 4-3)

Poster: And you kinda knew Super 8 had this category in its back pocket. And it looks like it needed it. (Point, Super 5-3)

Watch again: This is a bit of an unfair question because I watched Super 8 twice in the span of 2 nights. Fortunately it doesn’t matter. (Point, Midnight 5-4)

Overall: And we have our first non 10-bug movie in the Final Four. Which makes sense since there weren’t any in this bracket. And so you know what an accomplishment this is, it’s like the 6 seed making it to the Final Four. In case any of you care. Winner: Super 8 (5-4)

Double Feature Duel (Rd3): Midnight in Paris vs. Sherlock Holmes 2

Double Feature Duel (Rd3):
Midnight in Paris vs. Sherlock Holmes 2 

Not since the first scored matchup has there been a Sweet 16 matchup with as high a combined Bug Score (17.5). For whatever that’s worth.

Title: I’m sticking with my rule of 5. SH2:AGOS is a marquee changers nightmare. (Point, Midnight 1-0)

Funnier: Whoa! Tough one. The ridiculousness of Adrian Brody playing Dali is one type of humor, but Robert Downey Jr is another. Actually, this isn’t a tough one. Sorry for misleading you. (Point, Sherlock 1-1)

Better Turn: I didn’t see it coming. Which is good enough for a point in a game that doesn’t matter. (Point, Midnight 2-1)

Better Ending: This really is a tough one for real. Well, no it’s not. (Point, Sherlock 2-2)

Better Message: In lieu of the better ending, I’ll wrap it up in the better message category. Because it deserves some recognition in this game that doesn’t matter. (Point, Midnight 3-2)

Better Acting: Rachel McAdams cancels herself out. Taking the lowest common denominator, that pits Jude Law and Downey Jr. against Owen Wilson and a bunch of kinda famous other people. Tiebreaker: Owen Wilson. And not in a good way. (Point, Sherlock 3-3)

More Creative: It’s getting tight! And though I’d give SH2 the “fun” award, I’ll have to go to Woody Allen for the Creativity category. (Point, Midnight 4-3)

Poster: Sherlock just doesn’t have a lot going for it. It was a good run. You’d have probably beat Super 8. (Point, Midnight 5-3)

Watch again: I’ll throw Sherlock a garbage point just out of respect. (Point, Sherlock 5-4)

Overall: Well, you weren’t able to take home any Oscars, but you made it to the Elite 8 in a game that doesn’t matter. How does that make you feel? Winner: Midnight in Paris (5-4)