Double Feature Duel (Rd3): Body of Lies vs. Big Fish

Double Feature Duel (Rd3):
Body of Lies vs. Big Fish

Who the hell did Body of Lies sleep with to get this far?

Title: Body of Lies is a serviceable title, but I picture a bunch of people sitting around a table going “well, I guess that’ll work” as opposed to “That’s perfect!” (Point, Big Fish 0-1)

Funnier: Neither is really a comedy, per se, but especially not Body of Lies. (Point, Big Fish 0-2)

Better Turn: To be completely honest, I barely remember Body of Lies anymore. (Point, Big Fish 0-3)

Better Ending: And even if I could, there’s very little way any movie outside of Frequency and Sixth Sense would beat Big Fish in this category. (Point, Big Fish 0-4)

Better Message: Ever feel like you were just going through the motions? Yeah, me too. (Point, Big Fish 0-5)

Better Acting: There are now 10 Best Picture nominees each year, but only 5 Best Director nominees. We all know those other five movies will never win, but it’s nice that the Academy recognized them. That’s the motivation behind this. (Point, Body of Lies 1-5)

More Creative: Tim Burton is nothing if not creative. This movie happens to also be good, which is not necessarily true of all his crap. (Point, Big Fish 1-6)

Poster: Make this an 0 for 3 for Body of Lies’ marketing department. (Point, Big Fish 1-7)

Watch again: I will honestly say that I’d probably watch Body of Lies right now. Mainly because I’ve realized that I don’t remember a damn thing about it, but it appears the me from 2 months ago really enjoyed it. (Point, Body of Lies 2-7)

Overall: Not surprising. I’m curious to see if there will be a bigger underdog to get to the Sweet 16 in the other quadrants.

Double Feature Duel (Rd2): Bridesmaids vs. Body of Lies

Double Feature Duel (Rd2):
Bridesmaids vs. Body of Lies

Boy meets girl. Boy loses girl. Boy gets girl back. This describes neither of these movies. Unless you consider Kristen Wiig a guy or the Jordanian intelligence a girl. Bridesmaids squeaked by The Illusionist based on the fact that it wasn’t The Prestige and Body of Lies beat up a documentary in at least three categories where it just needed to exist to get a point. In the immortal words of the Black-Eyed Peas, let’s get retarded!

Title: I’m just not going to go for movies that simply say what the movie is about. I understand the need for branding purposes, but you’re going to lose a point in this pointless contest. Sorry. (Point, Body of Lies 0-1)

Funnier: There aren’t a lot of movies that Bridesmaids isn’t funnier than. This isn’t one of them. (Point, Bridesmaids 1-1)

Better Turn: Once again, Bridesmaids had that turn echo thing going on. Didn’t I just see that exact same scene? Default point. (Point, Body of Lies 1-2)

Better Ending: I’m as big a Wilson Phillips fan as the next lesbian, but I’m not going to defend the Hollywood circle jerk. (Point, Body of Lies 1-3)

Better Message: Ugh. Eenie meenie miney, hopefully it doesn’t matter because I refuse to think this any longer. (Point, Bridesmaids 2-3)

Better Acting: I do love how Kristen Wiig can dislocate her collarbone in the name if humor, but I occasionally forget how good of an actor Russell Crowe is because he’s a movie star. (Point, Body of Lies 2-4)

Poster: Yes, this movie has Leo and Russell in it. I’m not so sure that I didn’t just design this poster in my head thinking about the movie. That’s not a compliment. (Point, Bridesmaids 3-4)

Watch again: I feel like I owe Body of Lies another watch since I know I didn’t get it all the first time through. That said, I have a feeling I’m going to want to see Wiig and Melissa McCarthy and their fart and non-fart jokes when it comes out on DVD (or streaming Netflix if I’m lucky). (Point, Bridesmaids 4-4)

More Creative: Body of Lies wasn’t exactly Memento, but I’m pretty sure Bridesmaids is just a remake of The Hangover. (Point, Body of Lies 4-5)

Overall: Well, that’s an upset for those paying attention. For whatever that’s worth. Really, it just makes the road that much easier for Big Fish. Let’s be honest.

Double Feature Duel: The Pixar Story vs. Body of Lies

Double Feature Duel:
The Pixar Story vs. Body of Lies

Bout #6: The Pixar Story and Body of Lies. These movies had a lot in common in that they both strung together still pictures and played them in rapid succession to create the illusion of movement. Passed that, they really didn’t have a lot in common.

Title: Pixar never really rely on clever movie titles to drum up business. Cars, Toy Story, Cars 2. Up is really one of their most clever titles and it’s only 2 letters. So go figure a documentary about their empire would have a similarly drab title. Point, Body of Lies (0-1)

Funnier: How could you go against a movie dedicated to telling the story of the franchise that has produced some of the funniest movies in the last decade? Here’s how. It was a documentary. It wasn’t really trying to be funny. Enter Russell Crowe. I forget how good of an actor he is because he’s now a movie star, but his deadpan delivery of his well-placed zingers was enough to earn this point. Point, Body of Lies (0-2)

Poster: “Trust no one. Deceive everyone.” That’s the tag line on Body of Lies. The Pixar Story simply has a storyboard scribbling of Buzz Lightyear drawn very small comparatively flying up to the sky. I like the simplicity and the symbolism. Point, The Pixar Story (1-2)

Better Turn: The Pixar Story is a documentary. Didn’t really have a turn. Point, Body of Lies (1-3)

Better Ending: Or an ending. Point, Body of Lies (1-4)

Better Message: Follow Your Dreams vs. Tell the Truth. I’m not a big advocate of the whole following your dreams thing, but I understand it. And to be honest, I don’t really think Body of Lies has a legit message. Point, The Pixar Story (2-4)

Better Acting: Documentary. Despite cameos from Tom Hanks and Tim Allen, I’m going with the movie that had actual acting. Point, Body of Lies (2-5)

More Creative: There are a lot of categories here that kill the hopes of documentaries. Oh well. Sorry, Pixar. I’m sure you’ll get over it. Point, Body of Lies (2-6)

Watch again: Believe it or not, after all that, I’d still probably watch The Pixar Story again. Mostly because Jenn fell asleep during it and it’s on Netflix streaming, but still. Point, The Pixar Story (3-6)

Overall: And we have our first upset! Granted, it's like the 8-9 upset, but still. On a bug scale, I’ll give The Pixar Story a 7.5 and Body of Lies a 7. And yet, Body of Lies wins the head to head matchup. That’s why they play the games. And the games ain’t lookin so good for future documentaries. Sorry again.