The Opposite of Disappointed

What's the opposite of disappointed? My latin roots would tell me that it's "appointed" but i know that means something completely different. This word just seems to have come from nowhere. One of you linguist people help me out here. I'm actually really curious. Alright, somebody ask Julie. She'll probably know.
STOMP!! information: We're going on the Thursday after we get back from Spring Break (for those of us at UMBC), which is the 28th. Tickets are $25 and I'm going to try and get them sometime Tuesday or Wednesday, so let me know for sure whether or not you can go sometime before then. And also, give me your money if you can. I trust you all and I wish I had enough money to lend to all of you, but I already have 9 friends from out of state going, so I have to fork up $250 for all of them and myself, and that'll pretty much clear out everything I have. And I'm not even sure I still have that much. So I'm going to be bugging everybody for their money before Tuesday, so get on the ball. Call your parents or something, but I need the money.

Alright, now that I'm done playing the bookie, I'll do the quote. This quote came from someone we all kind of know but isn't on the mailing list. I was eating breakfast with him, and he got up to leave saying "well, I gotta go to get to class early." His class wasn't for another 45 minutes, but he had to go back to his room, slowly get his books ready, and mosey to class:


Quote Of the Day 2/29

"Basically, I've got to hurry up so I can take my time."
-Matt Anderson


The catalyst,
Screaming Cricket.


Still Standing Right Here...

Classic Billyism

Well I'm beginning to think that my miraculous recovery is actually just a state of mind that my sickness is causing and I'm really lying shivering and unconscious in a gutter somewhere. So if you see me there, I'm not sleeping. Wake me up and bring me to some health place fast. Even if you have to beat me first. Especially if you have to beat me first. But not too hard.
I saw a cute girl today and she smiled at me. But I just couldn't smile back. I felt so bad. Probably because I had just gotten out of a handball game, before which I stayed up all night writing a paper, and before which I was bed-ridden for 3 days (I never said I was smart). But I just didn't have enough energy in me to smile. Anything I sent out would have been fake and it probably would have come across as a smirk, and that's not the impression I want to give. So that relationship ended rather abruptly.

Most of you won't understand this quote, and maybe that will make it funnier. And don't bother writing me back asking for an explanation, because I won't give you one. But for those of us who were there, we were rolling:


Quote Of the Day 2/28

"I fork your spoon to a knife."
-WonderBilly Taylor



So now Barnes' spoon can cut through meat.


Still seeing imaginary Care Bears, but otherwise O.K.,
Screaming Cricket.


Up On One Knee...

No Balls Needed

Well, in case you all were wondering, I feel a bit better today. After sweating my way through 9 changes of shirts last night and stumbling through dinner, I'm feeling somewhat normal. To tell you the truth, I think playing Magic and just staying awake has helped me out. And all those drugs probably didn't hurt either. And thanks everybody who offered to help me out in the past few days, specifically Laura, Chris, and Giese. Not to disclude anyone, but my memory has been kind of on and off since Sunday. And for those I haven't told yet, I lost somewhere around 6-7 pounds through starving and sweating. I'm actually going on a diet. I want to get back down to my original weight. You know, 8 pounds, 12 ounces.
Well I got off track there somewhere. Just to let you all know, when I have time, I will cut down the quote as a name thing because I do see that its annoyance factor is high. And not that anyone here really cares, but I'm going to see Garth Brooks!!! Alright, I'm done having fun, I guess I'll do that quote thing. This one is pretty straight forward and it comes from a first-timer to the quote of the day subscribers, so here you go...


Quote Of the Day 2/27

"Maybe Barnes could lend him his balls. He doesn't need them."
-Karen



Looks like Mike's been rubbing off on you.



3:00 and got a paper due tomorrow. Nothing's changed,
Extendo.


Still Standing Right Here...

Not Naked After All

Hi guys. I'm running a 102.1 fever, so please excuse me if I fall a little behind in the next few days as far as quotes go. And don't be surprised to see me wearing pants. And keep those responses about STOMP!! coming. BTW, still no correct answer in the contest, so keep
guessing.
In case you live on third south and haven't looked out the window, you should see what we did to that field when we played football in the mud on Friday. It looks like we were preparing it to grow crops. That field will take a long while to recover. Speaking of the game, I got to dinner and commented on how I had forgotten how much fun it was to shower with my clothes on...


Quote Of the Day 2/26

"I thought I was naked, but when all the mud washed away, it turns out I had clothes on."
-MJ

Sweating bullets but still shivering,
Dustin.


Sitting Down For A While...

How In the Hell Were Sexual Innuendos Not Super Annoying By Now

If you ever want to see confused and surprised faces, walk around with me when I have a suit and tie on. Everybody (even the people interviewing me) did that double take thing when they looked at me Saturday. Close friends didn't recognize me. It was kinda cool. And the whole day went well Saturday. The interview and group processing. I'll find out in a month if I got the position. Well, still no right answer in the contest, though a lot of people guessed for the same person. So the money is still out there for whoever gets it first. And you're third guess is your final one, so don't waste them.
This quote comes from our favorite foot-in-mouth expert, Laura. She was talking about... well, if I told you that, it wouldn't be half as funny...


Quote Of the Day 2/23

"Should I cover this first, or can I just stick it back in."
-Laura Fathead


P.S.- Chris, size really does matter. That's just what you "little dicks" say to make yourselves feel better, Yoda included.


Passively pursuing happiness,
Dustin.


Still Standing Right Here...

In a Dog

Well, that was a futile attempt at winning two tickets to Florida. For those that don't know, our basketball team had a game yesterday and they were giving away tickets to the "best dressed Floridian." I figured that what I'd wear wasn't too much a deviation from what I normally wear. So I put on my favorite outfit, white gloves, a pink Florida hat (surprise), a golf club, and high socks with sandals. I was outdone by a couple with lawn chairs, beach balls, an umbrella, and towels, and this naked guy with a surfboard. So I was pretty much humiliated. I looked normal. Just with a golf club. Oh well.
As far as the contest goes, I've had about 5 guesses, all of which were, and still are wrong. Though just yesterday, I got two messages in a row. The first was Weed asking if it was Greg, and that was wrong. The next message, a little later on in my inbox, was a message from Greg telling me he didn't want the quote of the day anymore. So I was considering giving Weed the dollar for his psychokinetic powers, but I don't believe in that stuff. So, to make the contest more interesting, I'm upping the stakes. First one to correctly identify the person who asked to be off the mailing list this semester (besides Greg) gets $5. If you were expecting anything more, to hell with you. How much do you think I have?
A few more things: The Good Guys have a handball game against SAE tomorrow. We beat ZBT 6-0 last time we played them. It might be fun for you guys to watch. So if you find yourself in the Fieldhouse at 12:55 tomorrow, stick around for 5 minutes. Or don't. I don't care. 2) Tomorrow at around 4:00, we're playing tackle football in back of Susquehanna. All are welcome, though a few would have a hell of a commute. 3) Tomorrow is the last day to drop classes without a W on your transcript. If you need to do so, then do so. I do. So whenever anyone sees me tomorrow, shout "PARAPSYCHOLOGY" really loud, and I'll know what you mean. 4) Last thing: I've got my interview to become an RA on Saturday at 9:00 in the morning. Wish me luck.

Well, Michelle and I were watching the basketball game and Crash started dancing with one of the cheerleaders and making a fool of himself, and this serious comment was made:


Quote Of the Day 2/22

"He would never do that if he wasn't in a dog."
-Michelle (my bell, whatcha gonna do?)


So far, I've gotten one reply saying they want to go to STOMP!! I'll be more animate about it later, but the sooner I get replies the better.


Licking the ceiling fan of torture,
Extendo.


Still Standing Right Here...

When Lying Becomes a Problem

Well, I'm finally caught up to today!!! And in case you all didn't know, it's Ash Wednesday. Depending on one's beliefs, you are supposed to make some sort of sacrifice starting today and lasting that long month and a half until Easter Sunday, when you can do it all you want. Wherever you want. Repeatedly throughout the day. As many times as your skin will allow you too.
Sorry, I got off the topic. Well, I don't plan on giving up something nearly as challenging as I did last year. I thought instead I'd maybe cut off a finger every weekend. It would almost be the
equivalent.
Anyway, before I get too off the topic, and while I'm thinking about it, STOMP!!! is coming to Washington D.C. I'm trying to raise interest for people to go, and I think I unofficially have about 20 people who want to go. I'll get back to you all with more details, but sometime around the 30th (the Saturday after we get back from Spring Break), we'll be car-pooling to the Warner theater to see what I thought was the best show I've ever seen. Tickets will be about $20. Ask all your friends and try to get back to me by the end of the month or as soon as possible. One more thing (sorry), there have been a few guesses about who wanted to get off my mailing list, and none have been correct. I guess I should have been more specific. I'll give a dollar to whoever can tell me the person who was on the mailing list at the beginning of the year, and isn't anymore because they wanted to get off. And Jenn said she'll give anybody a dollar who E-mails her personally. Well, with not much further ado, the quote. This is from my friend back home, and is just one of those intelligent commentaries on life:


Quote Of the Day 2/21

"It's not the lying that's the problem. It's when the other person finds out the truth that's the problem."
-Laurie Clemmer (you don't know her)



P.S. Everybody congratulate Misti on her first place finish in yesterday's Maryland East Championship, or whatever it was called.



Eating a ZBT handball sandwich,
Nitsud.


Still Standing Right Here...

Things Susquehanna Doesn't Get

Expect a few of these to come in rapid succession of one another. I've got to catch up. I forgot in my last message to warn all of you. There's a nasty little man running around campus. He is about 5'4" and is infamous for ripping videotapes out of VCRs. Last seen, he was going by the alibi of SuperDave, but he's also been known as Del-Chun, 1MAN2WILD4U, and Hey You, Dickhead. If you see this man, do not approach him. But you may sit at a distance and hurl big rocks at him. But he is otherwise a very dangerous man.

Alright, this past weekend, Greg and I were talking about the radio show we did. We mentioned that we talked about anal sex vs. vaginal sex, and here's what Chris Augysbugdersdger had to say about that:


Quote Of the Day 2/20

"Yeah, we don't get that in Susquehanna."
-Chris Augysbugdersdger


A slave to his own image,
Screaming Cricket.


Still Standing Right Here...

Work

Sorry these are so late, but I've been busy doing work lately. Well, it's kinda like work. I dress John up in funny clothes and stick cameras in dryers and call it work. But at any rate, I've been busy doing it. Which brings me to our class. Can I just say that John and I rock? We are without a doubt the coolest people in the damn class. We are the only ones who did something that actually made sense. And they were both funny. So everybody liked our videos and we didn't have to fuck the fat guy. Score two points for comedy over art. This quote has a little to do with our class. Actually, it has a lot to do with our class. We were discussing the outward appearance of our art teacher, and John put it best:

Quote Of the Day 2/19

"He looks like something fell out of my butt and it's walking around."
-My Roommate (in spirit)


Eating art majors for brunch,
Extendo.


Still Standing Right Here...

How Artists Get Rich

I have two things to comment on in this message, the weather and my stupidity. First, the weather: I remember walking home one night last week at 4:30 at night, and I when I got home, I went to sleep. I woke up kind of early, and there was no snow!! Nor any sign of snow. I didn't think anything of it and went about my day. But then the same thing happened that night!!!! I was just wondering if this was an illusion or if it happened to you guys too, because I'm not used to this shit happening in Pennsylvania. Then I went back to my room to put shorts on since it was so nice, and I stayed at Susquehanna overnight and went to breakfast in the middle of a blizzard!!!! I can't win. Somehow, I think my choice of attire for the day dictates whether it's going to snow or not.

My stupidity: I'm sick. I was up all night Friday typing my application to be an RA and yet I still thought that it would be a good idea to go out and play tackle football in the snow for 3 1/2 hours. I remember walking into Susquehanna and not being able to recognize it. Well, I at least had the common sense to go home early and I slept for 14 hours. It was the best time I've had in a while. And when I woke up, I was sorer than I've ever been. Muscles I didn't know I had hurt. I figured this is what it must be like to be hungover. Or at least the closest I've come yet. If anyone out there wants to give me a massage, I'm not going to turn you down. I know you only listed girls in your offer, Jay, but I'm a nice guy. And at this point, I'd almost be willing to dress up and act like a girl for you. Well, nothing I wouldn't do normally, at least.

This one came from a conversation John and I were having with Laura, Rob, and a few other people. Laura gave us an idea for a video topic and we told her we wouldn't do it because it was too "artistic." It was stupid and it didn't make sense. She then asked if we'd get an A and the answer was yes. She then asked us why we wouldn't do it then. John replied:


Quote Of the Day 2/16

"I can whore myself out and fuck fat guys and be rich..."
-My Roommate (kind of)


I think we all know what the rest of the sentence would have said had laughter not taken over at that point.

Bathing in Ben-Gay,
Extendo.


Still Standing Right Here...

Valentines Aftermath

WOW!!!! That was the most replies we've gotten in a while! I personally don't mind them, because I have nothing better to do than to dink around in the computer lab anyway, but try to keep the one line unnecessary replies to a minimum. Most people hate paging through a lot of crap just to get to "HeHeHe. That was funny." And I don't want a rerun of last year, where everybody asked to stop getting the quote not because of the quote, but because they couldn't tolerate the replies. I already had one person ask to be discluded from the list and whoever mails me back with who it is first, gets a dollar. That sounds fun, and relatively cheap.

Secondly, Weed: I know as well as you do that I don't despise love or a holiday that celebrates it. But I, as do most people, knock it because we are without others and don't want to be depressed on such a day that promoted love. A rational alternative is to if nothing else, pretend to be bitter. Besides, I'm so good at it. Ask Laura. Thirdly, Chris and my little attempt to bring smiles to all the girls of Susquehanna (and scattered few in the other dorms), did not have the turnout we expected. Two were actually returned (very cold), and a few people have told me that other people that we gave Valentines to think Chris or myself is obsessed with them. So instead of 210 girls thinking we did something sweet on Valentines Day, 210 girls think we're stalking them. But I did get a few compliments, so thanks those of you who did. But actually, most people were more confused than enlightened by the gesture. Oh, well.

Going along with the theme of bitterness, I was having a conversation of Greg about one of his first ex-girlfriends and he had this to say about her...

Quote of the Day 2/15/96

"I cried for three days. It was a really bitter break-up. But then she got fat and I felt better."
Your favorite Greg and mine.



Sleeping with the television on,
Dustin.


Still Standing Right Here...

A Valentine For the Ages

A Valentine For the Ages

Alright guys, I know that that new quote for a name thing I'm trying might be annoying, so tell me if you want me to change it or not. I like feedback. I figured if the list is going to be really long to scroll through, I could at least make it interesting.

HAPPY VALENTINES DAY!!!! It was weird. I walked around all yesterday really sick and completely energyless without a significant other on Valentine's Day, wondering why I was happy. I just felt good and I had no reason to. So I stopped thinking about it for fear that it might go away when I realized that I hate my life. But rather than sulk in self-pity on the night that everyone was out with their Schnookeylumps, I decided to do something about it. A friend told me that he and another friend bought 6 1/2 dozen roses and gave them to 78 girls in Chesapeake. That is roughly half of the dorm's population of girls. Well, now my giving (or competitive) nature kicked in. Chris (Angst Boy) and I were in Giant when I convinced him to buy every girl in Susquehanna a card and a Hershey's hug. Chris was upset they had just ran out of Hershey's Fucks, but what can you do. So we proceeded to hand sign every one, 210 in all, and leave them to every girl in Susquehanna. When we were done, we still had about 42 left and roughly 250 hugs. SO we went to all the other dorms and gave them to everyone we saw and spelled out a little message for Eddie, my friend who came up with the roses idea: BEAT THIS!!! -D&C. And we still went home alone, but damnit, it felt good. And it was better than the beer and porno evening that I had planned. And probably a little better than the farm animal and small children evening Chris had planned. So HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY to you all!!! But if anybody asks, I still hate the holiday.

Quote of the Day 2/14/96

"A man can be perfectly happy with any woman... as long as he doesn't love her."
-Somebody smart



Love, candy, and that "good" feeling,
Cupid.


Still Standing Right Here...

Return of the Bungling Idiots

THE BUNGLING IDIOTS STRIKE AGAIN!!! They had some doubts whether or not we were still around. We haven't let the idiot side of us surface in a while. But rest assured!!! The bungling idiots are back and they haven't missed a stride. Earlier today, John and I were in different classes, and after he got out of his class rather late, I wanted to show him some pictures I had done on the computer. So I peeked in this classroom to see that there were just a bunch of people sitting around silently seemingly waiting for the teacher to show up. So we walked straight in trying to be quick as to get done our business before the teacher got there. Well, by the time we had both walked to the completely opposite end of the room, everyone was staring at us. A redhead asked if he could help us. (The thing about art classes is that you can't tell the teacher apart from the students because the students are of all ages, and the teacher is usually pretty young anyway.) So it turns out that the redhead was the teacher. I wittingly replied something like "Oh, are you trying to conduct a class here?" To which he snottingly replied yes and everyone else was laughing at the two of us as we left in embarrassment. So the Bungling Idiots were most recently spotted at the computer labs.

Anyway, the quote. This one arose in the car when Greg and I were going to see American President. The quote is only funny if you know Greg and his reputation for conning us some free pizzas and sneaking into the dining hall, so sorry to everyone who doesn't know him. But the quote here came when Greg was talking about his new unexplainable and uncharacteristic change he's been going through:


Quote Of the Day 2/13

"...and you know what I've been doing a lot recently? This honesty shit. It's been costing me a lot of money!!"
-Greg "the Scammer"

By the way, I'm going to be wearing pants a lot more in the future, so try and keep the reactions of "OH my God, what are they?" or "Are you feeling O.K.?" as best as you can. I guess I'll be able to tolerate stuff like "Boy, you look good in those pants!" or "Damn, do you look good in those pants!" and even "Jeez! You know you look good in those pants!" Just don't be all too surprised though.


Avoiding comments about monkeys,
Screaming Cricket.


Sleeping With the Television On...

Valentines Quickie

Well, the day is coming. Buy your flowers and candy now!! Or your beer and Smack Ramen noodles, depending on what you're planning to do that night. And if any of you know any single girls out there, tell them sorry, but I'll be busy Wednesday. I have to prepare for the coming of Goser. Bad timing. Well, since I know none of you read this crap unless it's really short, I'll cut off now and give you today's...

Quote of the Day 2/12/96

"Chocolate syrup comes off really easily in the shower. I know!!"
-Kadybug "Dickless" Springle


Looking for the other five monkeys,
Dustin.


Still Standing Right Here...

Quote Of the Day 2/9/1996

Well, I hope you all had an enjoyable weekend. Well, at least most of you (Just kidding). For anyone interested (which includes no one on this list), the Pimp Daddies are playing at the Ratt on Thursday night. I'm sure I'll let you all know how it was. But I gotta do this funky quote thing I do and then head off to bed. So I'll get to business. This one comes from someone I doubted any of you know. But it's really funny anyway. She was slightly intoxicated when she said this to her friends and wouldn't have realized her error had I not pointed it out to her.


Quote Of the Day 2/9

"Hey, if you guys are going to make noise, you really outta keep it down."
-Jodi Somebody


Shooting myself in the foot,
Screaming Cricket.


Still Standing Right Here...

Quote Of the Day 2/8/1996

Well, in case anybody was wondering, the Everyday @ Six concert at the Bank last night was canceled due to the filming of an episode of Homicide. So you all have another chance to go if you choose to. I'll probably let you all know when it is so you can all jump at the chance to getting into the last select few spots in the car. Anyway, this quote came when Rachel, John, and I were walking to class very early in the morning on a slightly nippy day. Rachel's face was frozen in a squinting grin and I was entertaining the idea of putting pants on. John is remarking on how exactly cold it is. And here's where this quote comes from...

Quote Of the Day 2/8

"Remind me to get my ear on the way back."
-John Sleepyhead


Playing with my magic ball,
Extendo.


Still Standing Right Here...

Quote Of the Day 2/7/1996

It's only a week until Valentine's Day, so those of you who are unfortunate enough to be seeing somebody right now better start thinking of what you want to do. Because you have to do something. And that's why I hate Valentine's Day. It puts so much pressure on guys (and girls, but mostly guys) to do something sweet so their significant other will still love them. And it's even worse for those unfortunate souls without anyone. You just can't win. Undue pressure or loneliness. Sorry to be a cynic. Hope you couples have a romantic evening. *sneer* Anyway, I'm glad those of you who responded enjoyed the quote. I like your input. And I'm sorry to have caused some confusion, but I apparently forgot to say in yesterday’s message that Laura and I breaking up is just a joke. We were just kidding. Oops!

Well, I had to include this quote because very seldomly does SuperDave have actual intelligent thoughts. So here he is with his first actual insight on mathematics:


Quote Of the Day 2/7

"We can use a six-sided die. You know, one... two... three... four... five... six!"
-SD


Yes, Dave. That's right!! 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6.


Pointing my telescope at happy people,
Dustin.


Still Standing Right Here...

Quote Of the Day 2/6/1996

Alright guys, the quote of the day has returned!!! So get off my damn back. Some of us just got to school and haven't had the luxury of having gotten settled in yet. And you just expect me to drop everything and cater to your quote of the day needs. Well, I'll have you know, I was going through a tough time. First of all, Stryker got fired so I have to move out of my apartment, Pittsburgh lost, but more devastating than that was the fact that Dallas won. And for those of you who didn't hear yet, this past Saturday, Laura and I broke up again. It was just like the old times. All the guys cheered me on and Kady just sat there laughing the whole time saying "he'll be back." But this time, I think it was for good. Turns out she's been seeing somebody else for about 9 months now.

But seriously folks, this vacation was packed full of quotes, and this first one is one of my favorite kinds. You guessed it, one about how my life is pathetic and unimportant. So without much further ado, here's a conversation I had with a friend over the break about my love life:


Quote Of the Day 2/6

Erick: "When you fall, you fall hard!"
Me: "Yeah, and then I usually fall off."


Thanks, welcome back, and drive safely,
Dustin.


Still Standing Right Here...

Quote Of the Day 2/5/1996

It seems that Dustin is more concerned about our sex lives (by the way, Dustin, how is the gerbil?) than with his sworn duties as Quote of the Day Master, so I'll put up an offering for today. This is sort of an abridged version of the usual mailing list, but hell, y'all'll appreciate this....

I was sittin around talking with a few girls, and my girlfriend, Kris, who happens to have very short hair. Their sorority has their formal tomorrow night, so all of them are in that pre-party craze of getting their nails done and getting haircuts and other girl stuff.

Monica: Kris, do you have a hair curler I can borrow?

Kris: (grabbing her hair) Why in the world would I have a hair curler?

Monica: I don't know, maybe you use it for something else.

At first Kris didn't get the joke, but then all the girls started staring at me.



Mike