Ugly Mug

On Wed, 18 Mar, Good Joe wrote:

> It would appear that the last monster quote of the day took a lot out of
> ya big guy... I hope you're all right. Did you get a cramp, or are you
> just taking a breather?

Actually, I just sent that message yesterday. I don't know how you all got it last week. Stupid UMBC account.

Thank you all for your concern and I am OK, despite the wishes of several "save the whales" activists. And of course, Proznik. I've decided that sleep is a relatively important part of my life. Actually, indoor soccer started again. And wouldn't you know it, my first day back after my ankle injury and I busted my bursa sack. Apparently, our elbows and other joints come equipped with air bags, except they're filled with fluid (I guess they would be more like fluid bags). Well, I deployed mine last Wednesday and my elbow has been getting darker and bigger ever since. Somebody somewhere is laughing at me. And if it’s those damn whale people, I'm gonna be kicking somebody in the nuts, believe me you. And this time, it might not be Russ! Well, we here at UMBC will be leaving for Spring Break tomorrow, so I won't be checking my e-mail for a week or so. Which means of course, that I'll have to do some cleaning out of my mailbox when I get back, and that will take a trip up to ECS and a lot of time. I think I should get a special "quote of the day quota adjustment" of some sort. Oh well. Well, my point is that I definitely won't be doing any quote stuff for that week, but I plan on skipping all my classes next week until I'm caught up, damnit! Graduation be damned, I've got obligations! Well, anyway, have a good break everybody. You all owe me a big wet kiss when you get back.

Alright. This quote is going to be the greatest quote ever because it comes at the expense of Proz's looks, ugly bastard that he is. I heard that he might come up today, though I doubted, and I was telling Tony this. To this, he replied "Oh, what's he going to circle the parking lot this time?" (Proz has a habit of coming up here, an hour drive each way, and staying for 45 minutes) But that's not the quote. Tony went on to say how he actually saw Proz last time he was up here. And this is what he had to say about him...

Quote Of the Day 3/19/98

"He looked really bad. His hair was long in the back and it still looked like it used to on the top. He looked like a mixture between a country singer and a computer geek."
-Tone-Def


I can't legally write down on the internet what was said about his face.


Surrounded by idiots,
Dustin.


Still Standing Right Here...

Pre-QOTD Anniversary Warning

Hey guys, this one is going to be REALLY flippin' long, so you might want to go to the bathroom now. Maybe you should even go twice if you think it would help. But anyway, this next message out to explain my recent disappearance from duty. I won't be offended if you don't read it all at once. Hell, I won't even really know if you read it at all. I'm not going to quiz you or anything silly like that. So it's there if you want it. I hope you find it more fun than annoying. I was tempted to edit it when I discovered how long it was, but then I figured something along the lines of "Fuck it." Anyway, here you go troops, just for you...

An Apology

Hey guys. I wanted to apologize for the lack of a quote in the past few days. Shit has hit the fan in every possible area of my life and others are taking precedence right now (like maybe schoolwork).

Thanks and I'll be back very soon,
Cramming Cricket.


Still Studying Right Here...

The Birth of a Mockumentary

Hey everybody. Here's a word of warning: I'll be wearing pants again on Wednesday. That's this Wednesday, March 4th. Got it? And I'll also have a shirt and tie to match it and probably nice shoes to go with everything. So don't be so surprised when you see me on Wednesday and I have all this crap on, OK? That reminds me, can I borrow some clothes, Tony?
I gave my proposal for my Documentary film this semester earlier today. I have now been officially granted permission to begin working on "Nothing But Rim: World's Worst Basketball Team" this weekend. My teacher actually bought the concept that I was trying to make a real documentary. I just used the words "re-enact" and "stand-ins" instead of "script out" and "actors." So wheels are now in motion. Pretty soon you'll all be watching South Park on Comedy Central and see a commercial "Pink Hat Productions presents... Mockumentaries." It's a pipe dream, whatever that term means. I guess it could be a dream about pipes, but that's just not very exciting.
I also have these two short stories due tomorrow. One was due last week and the other was due the week before that one. I imagine something is due this week too, but hey, I'm overworked as it is. So I'm praying for snow. It just doesn't look like it's going to happen. Though, I do have a friend who's knee starts to hurt every time it's about to snow. So one night before I had to take an exam I was completely unprepared for, I snuck into her room and beat her in the knee. It didn't work then, but I'm willing to give it a second chance.

Alright, for those of you who don't know, I badly sprained my ankle in mid-January, and it's still not completely better. I have to do these exercises once a night (whenever I get around to it) and Suzanne has the elastic bands in her room. Well, I was sitting on the floor with the elastic band around the bedpost and stretched out to my left foot while I was pulling on it gently with my ankle and letting it go. Tony came in and stared right at this process, and knowing full well that my ankle was still hurt, made his pathetic attempt at small talk...


Quote Of the Day 3/2

Tony: "Are you doing your ankle exercises?"
Me: (very sarcastic tone) "No, Tony."
Tony: "I don't know, you could have been trying to strengthen the bedpost."


Yep. Pretty soon, Suzanne's bed will be able to do pool workouts again.


Faking an organism,
Extendo.


Still Standing Right Here...

You Just Don't Understand

From now on, I declare it legal to smack any person in the head who starts an argument with the phrase "No. You just don't understand..." or some derivative of that. That's the equivalent of saying "Hey, you're dumb. And you don't deserve for me to waste my time trying to explain this little bit of silly information with you." So anyway, if somebody does this to you, feel free to hit them square in the nose. And when they ask why you did it, you simply reply "Oh, you wouldn't understand anyway." That'll piss them off.
Hey guys, you'll be so proud of me. From 4:00 Friday night after we got back from the Wedding Singer, until 4:00 Saturday night when I had to work the desk, I got a total of 21 hours sleep. This is literally a new record for me. It beats that time a few years back when I had the Stryker Death Virus, and I guess I can't prove it, but I doubted I could even sleep that much when I was 1. Or for that matter, when I was none. Since birth, I have yet to have slept for 21 hours in any 24 hour time period until yesterday. And ironically, I'm exhausted. Go figure. That's the last time I'm sleeping, I'll tell you that!

I was sitting in the room listening to Suzanne argue with her mother, who can be irrational at times, to say the least. Well, she gets off the phone and starts complaining about her mother's attitude toward her. Well, I'm too tired to think of anything else, so here's what she said to us afterward...


Quote Of the Day 2/28&3/1

"When I argue with her, she calls me a mouthy rebellious child. Actually mom, I'm just smarter than you."
-Bungle Nut


P.S.- Nobody show this to her EVER! Got it? Please. Thanks.


No time to watch X-Files,
Studying Cricket.


Still Standing Right Here...